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Jeffry the Marshmallow Reebop

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[04 Jun 2002|05:46pm]
Ah, at last... the final end, the new beginning. And here, to sum up the pain and sorrow, of what will be of me come morrow... I poem that which we all should know, by that rabid, lustrous Poe.

A Dream Within A Dream

Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow-
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within me hand
Grains of the golden sand-
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep- while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?

-Edgar Allen Poe


... the afterlife is calling.
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My dear god... [22 May 2002|05:45pm]
[ mood | scared ]

As usual, I'm sitting in my nice cozy drawer at 3 in the morning ( Yes, I do keep track of time ) and then there's this scratching....

I jump out of my drawer and peek my little orange nose out and what do I see? CARNAGE!!!!

The horror! The Oreo thing...rat...whatever you call it...IT GOT LOOSE! And...and...

.....it ate three gerbils!!!.....

What's next? Me??? I'm too beautiful to die! Well...I mean, I'm too young to die! God save us all!

Rats are so...

so...

eeewww.

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[20 May 2002|03:56pm]
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh

Today was the most horrorful day of my entire marshmallowy life. Tragic I tell you, absolutely tragic, the terrors of today will forever be remembered, and my lawyer will be busy for quite some time.

It started with light, bright light, apparantly I was being let out. So yeah, I wasn't all that hyped, no one knows that in reality I sneak out every night and go around and pray to god that nothing eats me but shhh I didn't say that.

So I'm being handled and molested and groped and such ( They all want me, you know it's true) and all of the sudden- WOOSH! There I am in front of the camera. It was a Hollywood night to be remembered, that's for sure. The camera was right up in my face, angling up to my perfect marshmallow body in every way. That was hardcore, top rate footage there, yo.

And then the horror came.

The side splitting horror.

'Hey... the Degu is loose...'

DGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

It was madness, with all the kids screaming and the two gerbil girls racing around widly trying to tame the viscous Degu beast. They put on the fire gloves and Mrs. Sheldon nailed him, almost being bitten in the process as the gerbil girls grabbed him and held him up to the camera for his mug shot, that dirty little devil.

Hopefully, well have some shots of the chaos at a later date, hmm?

Well, over and out from the greatest Marshmallow Reebop on the planet.

/>/= |' |' r~4
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[18 May 2002|10:30am]
Well, as the seas turn it would be so that I've only 13 days to live....

That would be including finals.... without finals it's down to ten.

In all honesty... I don't want my life to end. I don't want to be tossed into a trashcan and rot away.

I don't want a eulogy... I don't want to die... I want to live!!!... I want to see Star Wars....

GOD SAVE THE MARSHMALLOWS!
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[16 May 2002|09:32pm]
So like I was sitting in my drawer... and I overhear this girl talking about how she would marry a guy named Pascal if he were alive... because of his triangle.

I busted my way out of lab drawer last night and did some research on this so called "Pascal's Triangle" ... here are my results----

1
1 1
1 2 1
1 3 3 1
1 4 6 4 1
1 5 10 10 5 1
1 6 15 20 15 6 1
1 7 21 35 35 21 7 1
1 8 28 56 70 56 28 8 1

There are the first eight rows, where each number is the sum of the two numbers above it, and n choose r (nCr) =
n!
r!(n-r)!

???????????????????????????????????????????????
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[14 May 2002|07:01pm]
So like yeah the godfather is going to eat me. I'm hoping that Oreo, the rat, can give me a nice eulogy once the godfather tracks me down and kills me. I think im suffering from an extreme case of arthiritis... or maybe my body is just getting stale.

Either way.. *shrugs*

Did you know that penicillin is pretty much ineffective against bacteria? Yes, the things you learn from a lab drawer are stunning and amazing. I've been trying to get the Zip Disk in here to date me but she seems to be playing hard to get.

So goes the life of a Marshmallow reebop.
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[09 Apr 2002|06:45pm]
*blinks* Light?......Wha?......

Oh the confusion...

They...They...they put me with the gerbil things!!!

I swear, 5 more seconds and they would have eaten me.

*bops up to monitor* I'm so scared right now....

I heard something about some dead baby gerbils....what's with the death thing?

Don't those stupid thing know how to take care of babies?

They need a lawyer.
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[06 Apr 2002|02:30pm]
My world consits of utter terror.

I have nightmares about the rat escaping and finding my drawer, clawing his way through the wood and ripping me into little marshmallow bits. He scares me even more than the pot kid does.

*shudder* I can only pray that I'll be alive tomorrow.
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[03 Apr 2002|08:37pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Ashes to ashes....dust to dust...

Today we said good-bye to our dear friend Doodle.

*sniffles with his orange marshmallow nose*

He was a good friend, and I know I won't soon forget him. My loving family misses him dearly.

That rat thing, Oreo, or whatever they call him, was getting really mean. Once they put him back in his cage, and made it smaller, he got really hostile.

Maybe they'll get rid of him.

He frightens me beyond belief!

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[20 Mar 2002|08:30pm]
Okay, so it's like this:

I was just fine in my drawer and all right, I mean, sure, there were those weird scritchy noses all night but I was cool. So I wake up this morning to the usual dim darkness, and all of the sudden.

LET THERE BE LIGHT!

I was brought out only to find that half of the mangy gerbils were gone due to some "gerbil giveaway" . The rat is back too. Turns out he was hiding under some microscope thingamajigger.

I Am Michael Jackson

This statement brought to you by the fact that I got plastic surgery today.

They pulled off my butt and then glued it back on. It felt kind of squishy with the glue and everything, but after that it was pretty cool. Now I don't have to worry about walking around and suddenly not having a butt anymore.
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[19 Mar 2002|08:39pm]
The fat hamster is back.

"The Godfather"

Snickers...that's what I heard they called him.

He's back, more chances for me to be eaten.

Who wants to take bets? Who will eat me first? The smelly pothead fat guy? Or the fat furry hamster?

*taking votes*
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[15 Mar 2002|11:54pm]
Someone stole the hamster.

The hairy one.

The one that had a mustache growing out of his gluteus maximus.

I'm going to hunt them down and kill them with my badass toothpick horns.
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[13 Mar 2002|08:57pm]
I'm so sick of the smell here.

That lazy kid who never pays any attention was playing with hydrchloric acid, if I had telekinesis I'd make the bowl tip all over him.

My poor baby brother Antoine...stupid freshmen...

It's very difficult to get a lawyer when you're locked up in a cabinet
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[13 Mar 2002|08:22pm]
[ mood | amused ]

It all started on a sunny day in March.

They were studying genetics. And Alelles.

I'm just a test tube baby. The product of student driven lust. *cries*.

I was created by a random alelle selection that determined my genotype, which is just a crapped out way of saying what why dna stuff is.

So yeah, then I got locked up in a lab locker to keep me away from all hell.

Today was very interesting. I managed to sneak out and observe this odd fellow in a blue sweatshirt who smelled like pot. He was messin' around with these gerbils, and later on more human males joined him and tried to breed a rat and a degu. Now I must say I don't think I'm as much of a freak as the hybrid of those to would be.

Unfortunately for the sex-driven males, little to nothing occured between the two species.

Then the bell rang.

And I got locked up.

That's like- anatomical discrimination. Just because I'm a marshmallow... don't I have rights? Don't I have freedoms?

I'm getting a lawyer.

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